How To become a WoP!!

One day a Novice came to the Master.
“Master,” he said, “How is it that I may become a Writer of Programs?”
the Master looked solemly at the Novice.
“Have you in your possession a Compiler of Source Code?” the Master asked.
“No,” replied the Novice.
the Master sent the Novice on a quest to the Store of Software.

Many hours later the Novice returned.
“Master,” he said, “How is it that I may become a Writer of Programs?”
the Master looked solemly at the Novice.
“Have you in your possession a Compiler of Source Code?” the Master asked.
“Yes,” replied the Novice.
the Master frowned at the Novice.
“You have a Compiler of Source. What now can prevent you from becoming
a Writer of Programs?”
the Novice fidgeted nervously and presented his Compiler of Source to
the Master.
“How is this used?” asked the Novice.
“Have you in your possession a Manual of Operation?” the Master asked.
“No,” replied the Novice.
the Master instructed the Novice as to where he could find the
Manual of Operation.

Many days later the Novice returned.
“Master,” he said, “How is it that I may become a Writer of Programs?”
the Master looked solemly at the Novice.
“Have you in your possession a Compiler of Source Code?” the Master asked.
“Yes,” replied the Novice.
“Have you in your possession a Manual of Operation?” the Master asked.
“Yes,” replied the Novice.
the Master frowned at the Novice.
“You have a Compiler of Source, and a Manual of Operation. What now can
prevent you from becomming a Writer of Programs?”

At this the Novice fidgeted nervously and presented his Manual of Operations to
the Master.
“How is this used?” asked the Novice.
the Master closed his eyes, and heaved a great sigh.
the Master sent the Novice on a quest to the School of Elementary.

Many years later the Novice returned.
“Master,” he said, “How is it that I may become a Writer of Programs?”
the Master looked solemly at the Novice.
“Have you in your possession a Compiler of Source Code, a Manual of Operation
and an Education of Elementary?” the Master asked.
“Yes,” replied the Novice.
the Master frowned at the Novice.
“What then can prevent you from becomming a Writer of Programs?”

the Novice fidgeted nervously. He looked around but could find nothing to
present to the Master. the Master smiled at the Novice.
“I see what problem plagues you.” said the Master.
“Oh great master, please tell me.” asked the Novice.

the Master turned the Novice toward the door, and with a supportive hand on his
shoulder said, “Go young Novice, and Read The Fucking Manual.”

And so the Novice became enlightened.

VOTM @ U2b.in

Yesterday I went to the site http://u2b.in to find that I have been nominated the Reader of the month. It was nice shock to come for a guy who has already broken 3 monitors, 5 Mouse, and 19 keyboards after visiting the site. My general condition after reading the blogs was photographed by the http://u2b.in official photographer Shivkumar.

VOTM @ u2b.in

It was sad to know that he is currently in the hospital getting treated for a massive blow to his stomach by some unknown elements of destruction. The chairman of u2b.in is putting the charges on my maid and watchman for his photographer’s present condition. I am still probing into the case.

Latest new being that I am asked to give an interview (again) by the Editor in Chief of the website http://u2b.in for being their first VOTM. The interview will be published soon.

When i was rich

The story dates back to the time when I was a kid. As you guys know I was rich so I got the local student magazine to take up my interview. I have forgotten most of the question will try to recreate the some of those, which I remember.
Rich Guy

The above picture showed how much rich I was. I had 100Rs note with me. This was much before I know how to clean my (as my grand mom says) you know what 😉 !!!!

Now to the interview. Just minutes before the interview the guy who was to take my interview came to me and said here are the questions which I would be asking to you and these are the answer you have to give and we will print it for you.

Interviewer> we have got with us master (remember I was a kid) Santosh Kumar. Welcome Dear (with a glare)! We are going to talk to him about his life, status and Money.

(Note the question asked will be written as Q> and answer is started with A>)

Q> So Santosh tell us more about yourself and your background?
A> I have a big family. My grand dad is 6 Feet tall, my father is 5’11’ tall and I am yet to reach 3 Feet. My background is presently the same as yours. A black wall with peeling paint and lots of stain of hair oil.

Q> Nice reply Santosh. You seem to have a really big family. A rumor is going on that you are the best of the best when it comes to money?
A> Ya I am known to have a love for money that’s why I have specially asked my mother to put a money plant in our house.

Q> we have even head that you hold money by your teeth.
A> Ya I do hold it because the last time I put it in mouth I swallowed it.

Q> when was the last time you swallowed the coin
A> It was just five minutes back when we started talking. I forgot to take it out and now it’s in my tummy!!! It was my last 25 paise coin 😥

Q> as the saying goes behind every successful man there is a women, is there any1 in your life?
A> (Blushing and smiling) Ya there is one.

Q> it means the one who ever she is has contributed to your present condition.
A> Yes a lot. In past I was a Hundreds rupee (as seen in the picture) owner but the ice cream and chocolate cost has taken everything.

Q> so what’s your present condition!
A> the next picture depicts my true state.

Poor Guy

The interviewer: Go away you M()r()|\| you have wasted my time. You don’t have a single penny. You looser leave this place else I will break you leg and than you have hold you leg with your teeth.