Of Dreams and Dreamer

This is just what I believe about my life. Sometimes when I think about it I feel what an ass I have been to play with so and the next second I think whatever I have done is correct either it was love, friends, education, investment, job or anything in between.

Some of you may say that my last post was about what all we think and how our life should be. But guys forget it not that we often look back and cherish that happy moments, cry on those sad moments but its not always but just once in a while. So it was one of those days when I was thinking how have I fared in life.

Than came this realization that I have hurt of loads people down the lane. One of them was a Dream. It was the time when Google Mail was the new kid on the block and yahoo was the biggest star on the horizon. Half of the world thought that yahoo and msn chat is best thing happened to us after telephone J, including yours truly. I was in my 3rd year of engineering and the yahoo chat rooms recorded much more attendance than college classes. It was not just type and talk chat but it was full duplex voice chat (sometimes I love those techie jarons). Most of us used to play antrashri and talk out heart out. There I met this girl who had a chat id not so common.

She had a name, which meant Dream and it was truly like dream that I met someone online and talked. It was fun and than I started getting calls. The numbers from which the calls came was unknown to me but the voices were known. They were the same people who I have met online and talked and one of them was Dream. The same Dream I have talked to and wanted to see in life. But as the saying goes “ man proposed and god deposed” it was same with me some problem and we parted out ways without meeting.

So a story long forgotten remain in the Dream and I became a Dreamer. Thank you my Dream where ever you are. Sorry for whatever I have wrong.

drunk

this is a quick post when i am drunk as a regular drukard. shit full of bacardi which was finished by 3 of us. the finale was a neat(raw, for some), with a dash of lemon and salt. You people must be thinking why so much of spirit. it was the annual day of my of my roomie’s company.  so to celebrate we had a party at my place.  I also wish to apologizes to all those people who dont want me to drink but it was just remove the mental strain. I hope u will pardon me.and as far as the post tilted “Will i be” is concerned i happy to tell that the matter is on the safer side on the line. thanks to all of you for having faith in me. tough the matter is not yet closed more updated will be coming up later. Let me introduce a new blog writer on this blog, named Deepa. she would be writing on the same location but its her will when she write. hope you guys appreciate her writing talent. she is poetess in making, and most of her poems are in hindi. i will try to translates her poems english, if she writes anything poetic.Till than keep drinking at ur home and let world be a safe place to live in. 

Dream

This post is dedicated to a dream which i had broken.Before that some good news. We have finished our trainee project and we are free these days. How do we celebrate? What could be a better way to celebrate by doing the way we used to do it during our college days? BUNK! We bunked office and went to watch Race. A team of 7 of us left office at 2 and had a fun filled day with popcorn and loads of babes. Nah not the office ones but on the screen. I heard from that dream yesterday and this to tell her i am really sorry!!

Down the Memory lane!!

I dont know how people feel when the look back and see their past but when i see it my past its full of happy and sad moments. For those who feel it was a their past was great and miss it I will say buddy why to waste your present for your past. and those who are still crying i will say stop crying the future has a something better in its bag.

Those who are still thinking why am i writing this post than guys for the record yours truly was reading letters written to him 6 years ago and missing his past his love and his life. May be its the beer which is taking its toll or its the letter that made me write this post at this ungodly hour.

Some of those letter were written by a person who is miles away and happily married. and some from my mom(which are a rare gem) and one from my dad (The rarest gem). For those who are thinking these mails as E-mails than mind you guys these letter are written with ink and on paper. and some of them gave me real strength when i was low. Like the one from my father, which was written when i was to write my class 12th exam and i was not at all sure that i will pass. It was his letter which gave me strength. I still remember the words. He wrote

Dear son,

I am fine and hope that your are also good. Further, dont worry about the results. Just give in your best and i am sure every thing will be the come out good. Dont worry what will happen for if you do give your best you will know you have given your best shot.

Love,

Your Dad.

Than there are letter from someone whom i used to call Sana. she was born with me and died with me.

All those times makes me fell nostalgic. All of them are inside a folder named “Santosh Kumar” and dated 2002 but contains memories of a life time.

Ten things I miss having in my life now

 

I have been tagged by one of the reader, renamed from “Honey Bee” to, “Bee, Honey Bee” (a la – Bond, James Bond estyle)

1.                  Those school prayers where we used o recite Sanskrit shlokas. I still remember studing in Sarasawati Shishu Mandir at my native village where we used to sing “Shanti Path” (peace hymn). It gave internal peace than the prayer sung at my English medium school. Though some of them were at par with the Sanskrit shlokas. Like Rabindra nath thakurs – Where mind is without fear.

 2.                  The times when the whole class was your friend. Those school days where love was what you did to your class teacher than to your classmate. When the person who shared his/her lunch box with you was your best friend. The only difference between a girl and boy was of skirt and shorts

 3.                  I was send to hostel when I was in class 4th (the same way my elder sis and bro were sent off). So I don’t know what does it takes to stay at home and get the love of mom and dad. If given a chance I would love to stay with mom and dad. But if you ask me what I will do with my kid. I will surely send them to hostel

 4.                  Those hormonal effects when you reach middle school. Those crush, proposals and rejections. I was one of those normal guys and so was my crush. IT happened when I was old enough to know more difference between a guy and gal. It was a one sided affair went on for 6 months after that she left the school :).

 5.                  No I can forget the hostel days. So was I. Those friends and those pranks you play and the times you bullied you juniors and times you were bullied. To bunk the hostel walls and go and watch the movies.

 6.                  Those measly pocket money you get every week end. And trips to the Local Guardian’s place on outings days,

 7.                  Coming down to college and a new smell of freedom. Bunking classes were much easier than taking a sick leave.

 8.                  Those weekend birthday parties where booze was an essential item. It was the time when food was surplus and booze was scarce.

 9.                  College never gave the exam blues as much it was in school. The study was the first priority in school days and it become the last when I came down to college. Marks 71% in 10th, 61 in 12th, and 57 in college is a sure shot sign of that.

 10.              For reasons unknown to me I still miss my school days more than my college days.