10 Stupid practices i have

This blog is dedicated to the lady who calls her self a BEE and her stings “Where it hurts the MOST”

If you are thinking why its so. The reason is this lady has asked me to write this post. WHen i read the topic i thought asking a stupid to write 10 stupid practices? I think 99% of my activity is STUPID, but still BEE this one is for you!!

10. I still read in LOO!! (Including newspaper, magazine and scribbles in the public LOO )

9. Whenever i feel bored i call my frens and bore them

8. I love to eat sugar with my food. even Daal Chawal!!

7. I tip the waiter at the restaurant where I eat daily!

6. I transfer my salary on the first day of its getting credited from Canara Bank to ICICI

5. i love to sleep in my undies

4 And love to take bath naked

3. I sing my best(Worst and loudest) when i am taking bath or a song which i like is coming on the TV

2. I tend to look everything other than the person i am talking to. (Food is the first preference)

1. Whenever i eat or drink my smallest finger stands up like and Antenna. (Picture Attached)

Antenna

The Three Engineers!!

Once upon a time two Project managers and one engineer met in the rest room of a big hotel.

The first PM goes and washes his hands, dries his hand and than takes out tissue to remove what ever is left. He says I am working with (Insert the company you hate the most) and we are taught to use all the resources evenly.

The second PM who was from (Insert the company you hate) and he washes his hand takes the tissue and dries his hand till there was not a single dry corner left. He says I am taught to use the resources to the max.

The engineer zips his pant and walks out. Than the other two guys say it seems you are not taught anything in your company. The engineer said I am taught not to PEE on my own hand!

The Week of forwards!!

I thought its better to write a post than to tell people of my old silly soul which was tortured to life and the reason for so many forwards as a post instead of original post.

I was planning to write the whole thing in chronological order but it better if I narrate the story.

The day was the same as usual and the night was not. I was sitting in cubicle listening to don’t remember who it was (does it matter). Suddenly the call came on my intercom. A girl’s voice on the other hand speaks…

Voice – Santosh?
Me – Yes?
Voice – Hi!
Me – Hi!
Voice – We are waiting for you.
Me – Waiting?
Voice – Yes. You forgot?
Me – (Confused) I think so.
Voice – Come on you cant delay us anymore. It’s really important.
Me – than who is stopping you.
Voice – You!
Me – (Still confused) Me? How?
Voice –By not coming??
Me – (Am I so important in this company?) For what?
Voice – This is your HR and we are waiting for your appraisal meeting.

This conversation happened some 4 months back. And from that day till today I am yet to find out the true meaning of a meeting.

For the Higher Management – I am getting bored lets call a meeting and talk to some people. (Here they talk and rest listen)

For HR – We need to terminate this guy so call a meeting and let him know in a dramatic situation

For PM/PL – Hmm This guy is not working call a meeting and assign him so much job so that he will have to work 18 hours a day and 7 days a week!

All of them together – A time pass meeting to discus some silly issue.

A committee meeting – No work just talk.

For an employee like me – Buddy you are screwed!

The same thing happened to me a few weeks back. I was called for a meeting and told to work more and browse the net less. In past I used to work for a horrifying 8-10, nah not hours, Minutes each day. But now I am working bit more. The amount of work involves 4 hours of meeting, 3 hours of discussion, 1 hour of tea break, 30 minutes of lunch and mind boggling 30 minutes of works. I am presently busy in most of these meeting! So guys you may be seeing a lots of forwards than actual blog entries.

Worried Boss

Another Forward!! I loved the ending. much like the jeff archers endings!!

A boss wondered why one of his most valued employees had not phoned in sick one day. Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialed the employers home phone number and was greeted with a Child’s’ whisper.

“Hello”

“Is your daddy home?” he asked

“Yes” whispered the small voice

“May I talk with him?”

“No”

Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, “Is your Mummy there?”

“Yes”

“May I talk with her?”

Again the small voice whispered, “No”

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss
Asked, “Is anybody else there?”

“Yes, whispered the boy, “a policeman”

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee’s home, the boss asked,
“May I speak with the policeman?”

“No, he’s busy”, whispered the child

“Busy doing what?”

Talking to daddy and mommy and the fireman”, came the answer.

Growing more worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter, through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, “What’s that noise?”

“A helicopter” answered the whispering voice.

“What is going on there?!”, demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.

Again whispering, the child answered, “The search team just landed the helicopter.”

Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked, “What are they searching for?!!.”

Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle…

“ME”

NO New POST!!

Hey guys.

This post is a small reminder that i may not be online for few days (Don’t panic if it turns to weeks) No it wont change into months. I am really busy with my work. Its already past eight and i am still at office. i was here before 9 am. Nah don’t feel sorry. So please bear with me. The reply to comments will be done once in a while.

The schedule is so tight that i am not able to read all the blog entries you guys make. hope you will understand.

Till than!!